Hello boys and girls and hermaphrodites and cross-dressers and transsexuals. A little update here for ya. Last Friday (October 22nd) we got to be on the radio on KHWK 95.9 FM in Pahrump, Nevada! Now before you scream "sell-out" and declare shenanigans on us, it was a student run radio station and we got no money out of it. But we got to be interviewed (well, sorta, heh) by Allison and she played some tunes from our new recording on the airwaves, which was pretty cool.

Then the next day we got to venture back to Pahrump with local pals the Happy Campers and Bad Chile from L.A. to play a show with End Over End and Pahrump natives Campus Security. It was our first show outside of Vegas, and it was a total blast. I'm sorry to say, but the Pahrump kids showed up all you Vegas kids hardcore - I don't think we've ever gotten that good of a response here in Vegas. It's weird - the kids up there actually seemed to be having a good time... strange concept, huh? I mean, they even had a mosh pit going for us, that's pretty rare. We even got paid, some good money I might add, which was a nice change for once. But enough dogging on you Vegas kids, you know we love you... Anyways, the show went really well, and Bad Chile just plain rocked the house. Muchos thanx to Jim Scott from Campus Security, who set up the show and our radio exploits and is basically just cool.

Um, in other news, we have received a new batch of those cool vinyl stickers from Katie (THANX KATIE!!), you can check 'em out on our merchandise page. We are planning to release a new 4-song demo, just as soon as we get a good title/cover idea. Any ideas would be much appreciated, e-mail us and let us know.

Lastly, we are playing at Sound Barrier on Saturday, November 13th with FTDS and Alkaline Trio, so come to the show if you have nothing better to do. It should be fun.

Anyways, hope everyone had a fun Halloween, if you weren't at the CUAD show you missed out big time. And I'm spent...laters.

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Okay I am gonna try and write an update here now, since you have all been complaining... I mean, come on, it's only been a month or so, we've gone way longer without an update before. In fact, there was a day long ago when we didn't even have a "website" on this new-fangled "internet" of yours, you damn kids are all spoiled!

Anyways, lots of stuff has happened since the last update, let's see if I can cover it... we have been slacking basically. Some highlights... we played with a poppy band from Chicago called Allister (I think they have a new CD out on Drive-Thru Records). They were pretty cool, and they even covered a Backstreet Boys song and the Fraggle Rock Theme Song - how cool is that?!? ...we also played a show with this rad San Diego band called the Cause. Not only were they really tight, but they also lived up to their name with their political and social statements. Plus they had our backs when we almost got in a brawl with the McCarthys, but that's another story for another time... we played the fabled All Kore II, that was pretty rad. Jonn even crowdsurfed, we have the photo posted in his pics (go Wobin!). We will also be posting more pics from AKII as soon as my school gets burned down and I get some free time. Um, what else... oh yeah, we played at the 1st Through Squishy Eyes Show at Squishy Megan's house, which went pretty damn well for the three days notice everyone had (thanx Megan for sacrificing your house and the goats!) (wait - the goats weren't sacrificed - they were liberated...) ...and we also played another Batcave Comic Store bash that was a benefit to keep the place open. Hope it helped out some.

We have managed to work a couple new songs into our rotation, "Uninvited," by Mr. Whalen, and "Family Values," (dubbed the Iron Maiden Song by the Curl Up Kids) by Mr. Vincent. At a few shows you might have caught us playing a revised version of "Christine" entitled "Christopher," care of Will and Mike. If you didn't hear us play it, don't ask - it'll be safer that way.

I'm sure you've already heard that the Castle is no longer in existence, at least as we knew it, which isn't the worst thing and isn't the best thing. It was sold and rumor has it the new owners are turning it back into a bar. Three cheers for alcohol, eh? It does kinda suck that two shows we were supposed to play there had to be cancelled, but oh well. So for the moment we really don't have any upcoming shows except possibly one in October in Pahrump with the Happy Campers and Campus Security.

Also, we are sad to announce that our Official Stuff Salesman Robbie Marsh has left us to pursue his love of hockey in Massachusetts. We all love ya much and wish you well, Robbie! sniff sniff..

As for website news, there are two brand spanking new sections up and operational; the flyers page (under pics), where we have posted some of the better looking flyers we've been on, and the press page, where we have posted some of our interviews and reviews. Check them out if you get a chance. Also there are some new pics posted and some new links, if you really have no life you can look at those.

Anyways, I think that is about it for now, if I forgot anything just let me know. Peace out.

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Um... I don't really have much to say, other than LOOK AT OUR NUDE ARSES IN OUR BIOS!!!

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Check it out - new pics up! Squishy Eyed Heather was rad enough to scan them on and fix em all up nice for us. Some were taken by Willum Bailey at Travis Hoppe's Birthday Bash '98, and the others were taken at the Huntridge by Scott Harrison. Check out Scott's site Caught in the Act. We also put up pics on the merchandise page so people can kinda sorta see what it is that they are buying. Whoopie. Anyways, we found something interesting on page 29 in the latest issue of Las Vegas Weekly (July 21-27, 1999). Let's see if you can find what's wrong with it. Read on..

"On Saturday, July 24th, Legends Lounge, at 865 N. Lamb Blvd., will host the first concert beginning at 9 p.m. Performers for the evening include alternative rockers Insomnia; folk rockers Mark Huff and the Melancholics; and ska band 7' Midget. Cover charge is a $3 donation and you must be at least 21 years old to attend."

- Carla J. Zvosec

"Ska band"? To clarify things though, we aren't even playing at this show. We couldn't because the Loseys are going to be in Colorado. I dunno what they were smoking. But pick up a copy and see for yourself - 7 FOOT MIDGET THE SKA BAND!!! Heh!

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Hi again. Look - updates are getting more frequent!!! Anyways, uh we started recording. It is going good, blah blah blah... but this update is really to give out thanks to where it's due... First off, thanx to Matt "Long Dong" Gardella for letting us use his really nice (and sexy) bass on our recording. Next, thanx to Curl Up And Geoff for allowing us to utilize his kick-arse Hartke bass head on our recording (if anyone knows Geoff's last name, please email us ASAP, but for now its a mystery...). If Jonn had a job and wasn't so broke we wouldn't have to mooch so much. Oh well - we have good friends!! Also, thanx to Katie Stewart for making us a new batch of those cool vinyl stickers... we'll have them at the show on Thursday. Anyways, big thanx to you guys! Bye fer now!

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Hi. Some of you folks may have noticed that this site has not been updated for a long time, and to you I say - GET A LIFE!!! Okay, having said that, GO DO SOMETHING PRODUCTIVE NOW!!! But anyway, this horrendous act of negligence isn't due to a lack of effort on our parts. See, we've been experiencing some technical difficulties with the server and whatnot, so it was actually metaphysically impossible for us to update the site. But we're back, and we have more peanuts than ever.

So, anyway, here's an update: Nick Whalen was sick (again) and has a job (again). Nick Vincent took his driver's test (again) and finally got his license. Jay and Jonn are still vegetarian. Jay got his license too (on the first try). Jonn still has inverted nipples. Well, actually, just one.

The recording we did at the Castle was good, but we sucked, so we don't know if we'll release any of it any time soon. Our show at the Castle with One Hit Wonder and Jefferies Fan Club was fun, thanx to those who were there. The legendary and amazing and beautiful (not to mention vegan) Christine Gamboa made a guest appearance and we dedicated the song to her. (for those of you out there who are unenlightened, our song "Christine" was written about Ms. Gamboa almost three years ago) And she even hung out with us! How rad! (I just realized that I use parentheses way too much...) Also, our 2nd Annual Underwear Show went good, except for the fact that we played in our underwear. Evenground rocked!

We are being gigantic slackers and we still don't have any shirts, but keep bugging us and maybe we'll get on it. We are proud to announce that we have gotten our first out of state customer who we didn't have to persuade (or use cattle rods) to get to buy something!! We don't even know her!! Thanx to Kim from Maryland for buying a tape and supporting our IBC habit!!

Also, we have begun the ardeous task of planning our next album - it will be a full length CD, probably around 12 songs or so, and hopefully it will actually sound decent. We are planning to rerecord three songs from our tape ("Idiotic Patriotic", "Just a Slice of Butter and Some Bread", and "Christine"), and the rest will be brand spankin' new. We are going into the studio next week to record our first batch of songs for the CD: "Idiotic Patriotic", "Tightrope Without a Net", "Just a Slice of Butter and Some Bread", and "I Don't Date Mormons 'Cuz They Don't Date Me." Hopefully they turn out good.

Oh, and check out the shows page for new shows and the bios page for Robbie Marsh's bio - he's the poor guy who always gets stuck with selling our stuff while we frolic about playing our devil music on stage.

Well, that's about it for now, thanks for listening (reading?) and don't forget to come to our shows and make fun of us.

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Hey all you weirdos who actually read this. Um... for some strange reason, we recorded live Friday at the Castle. Everybody is asking when we are going to release it, the answer is we're not. It just seemed like something neat to do and find out how bad we suck firsthand instead of hearing it from all of you people. Probably the most that will ever come of this will be an exclusive live MP3 of "I Don't Date Mormons 'Cuz They Don't Date Me" or something like that, available only to you net nerds on this very site. That is, if the recording is any good. Anyway, big thanks to everyone who came to the Castle Friday, and thanks to Fat Like Brad for having us play, their drummer Nick has a cool name. Longshot rocks. We now have more tapes for sale, and hopefully soon we'll have some more shirts, maybe even some different ones. Also, we have some new shows planned, so check out the shows page. Come to the Batcave show Sunday - it's free, kids!!!

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We all went and saw NOFX play on Thursday so now we are quitting the band and committing suicide because our lives are now complete. Sorry, no refunds on those tapes.

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Hello everyone. We are finally updating the news after years of dormancy. (okay, so it hasn't been THAT long, but almost) Well, the show at the Huntridge yesterday was stuperifous. No one fell off the stage this time (well, we won't count Jonn), although Jonn did get caught with his zipper down and his manhood was threatening to expose itself. Thanx to the compassionate audience who prevented such a terrible disaster from occurring. We are now sold out of all our merchandise, thanx to our new salesman, Andrew, who sold everything we had (including our virginity) at the show last night. But we will hopefully replenish our supplies in time for the show at the Castle. As you might have noticed, the site has been updated a bit recently. We now have Mike the Roadie's bio up, so you can stop waiting with unbridled anticipation now. We have reorganized our pics page, and we put up a few new photos, too. Also, we are always adding new shows to the shows page, so check them out. We put up an anusload of new links on the links page, some bands, some zines, some other crap - check them out if you have no life. As for the band, we've been working on a few new songs and just playing a lot of shows and parties or whatever. I guess that's it for today's installment, tune in next week for our exciting conclusion when Jay confronts Alee and she confesses to being desperately in love with him.

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OK, OK, I know, we haven't updated this thing in a while... what can I say? We've been busy. Anyway, the shows at the Huntridge were a blast. The first, with Straight Faced, was our first show there and we peed our pants... Hey - don't laugh! It's scary up there on stage! Plus those guys from Straight Faced are all big and hairy and mean-lookin'! But yeah, we were lucky to get to play on the same stage that we've seen so many of our idols hock loogies on before us, and we had fun screwing our songs up as usual. The second show with the Dickies and Das Klown didn't turn out as well... must've been the "high price" (cheap-ass punk kids). But we had fun anyway. Thanx to all who came out to support us. In other news... we have more shirts available now, and we've finally got the merchandise page up. Check it out! And if you haven't heard about the Punkapaloozers show yet, then I say to you, "Have you been frozen in carbonite for the past month?!?!?" It was a big success and very fun. The bands rocked and so did you. And lastly, if you have nothing better to do than eat your toe cheese, check out this rad new site called All Kore - it is the best site for the latest news on the punk rock scene here in Vegas, with info on shows, reviews, local band info, etc. Very cool. Ta-ta for now!

P.S. We will soon have a new bio up for our trusty roadie Mike Gardner, who has a mom who is British, so watch and wait with unbridled anticipation!!!

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We have shirts. Come to our shows. Jonn needs a new bass. Please donate all basses by e-mailing him. Thank you.

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Gave the website a facelift. Hope it looks better!

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Bonjour, the midgets are going to play a show at the Huntridge on Saturday the 9th of January. If you want more information please go to the shows page.

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